Posted 10:24pm, Wednesday, September 18, 2002

The new Fall season is upon us. No, I’m not talking Autumn fashions. I mean the new prime time network shows.

I remember as a kid, looking forward to picking up TV Guide’s Fall Preview issue. (Funny how the TV Guide is pretty much rendered obsolete these days with the advent of scrollable listings on cable and satellite systems, but, hey, that’s another story).

As critics have been crying for the last decade, broadcast TV may be dead. Cable is where all the action is these days.

While everyone agrees that HBO kicks ass, I need to point out that I’m not a big fan of their popular shows. I think “The Sopranos” is okay, but it just feels a bit too familiar. It’s like Scorsese got together with DeNiro and cooked up “Analyze This” crossed with “Goodfellas.”

“Sex in the City” is clearly a chick’s show. A friend conjectures that they watch it for the empowerment of women turning the tables; using men as sex objects. That, or fashion and earring tips.

“Six Feet Under” holds no interest for me either. Call me crazy, but I have no interest in watching a family that runs a mortuary, no matter how quirky they are.

However, I absolutely love “Curb Your Enthusiasm.” It is the funniest show on TV, which is not surprising considering it comes from Larry David. One recent review called it funnier than “Seinfeld.” Not sure I agree on that one yet, but it’s gaining.

I take delight in watching Larry dig himself into deeper and deeper holes with each episode. My wife said she can’t watch it any more because it makes her so uncomfortable to see how he gets himself into hot water. Which is exactly the point: the audience squirms at every stupid decision he makes. Another great thing about this show is that it’s a solid half-hour, no commercials.

Meanwhile, USA has the tremendously entertaining “Monk.” Tony Shaloub finally has a showcase for his comedic skills. He’s one of the guys I root for to find their starring vehicle. David Allen Grier and Bonnie Hunt are still looking for their's.

ABC is so desperate for programming, they’re running re-runs of “Monk.” Rumor has it that Disney’s Michael Eisner’s trying to swing a first run deal with Barry Diller at USA. Fat chance. Why would USA want to give up a kick-ass show?

“Friends” is dying a slow death on NBC and they’ve spun off “Law & Order” to the nth degree. A formula which CBS is only too happy to recreate with “CSI.”

“Frasier” is the only NBC show that still maintains a high writing standard. The laughs are still there and that’s all that matters.
Over at CBS, they have the gall to set a medical show in San Francisco (“Presidio Med”) and not include any Asian cast members. A hospital in San Francisco without ANY Chinese doctors!?! I’m sorry, but I can’t suspend my disbelief that much.

It seems like Fox is the only broadcast network worth watching with regularity anymore. Perhaps because they’re still seen as a bit of an underdog, they manage to surprise and entertain with shows that exceed the minimum requirements for action and laughter.

They added to their already strong line up of shows (“The Simpsons,” “Malcolm in the Middle,” “Futurama,” etc) last year with “24,” “The Bernie Mac Show” and “Grounded for Life.” Sure they let some almost as many good ones get away (“Undeclared,” “The Tick,” and “Greg the Bunny”), but their batting average is the best of the networks.

Commercially speaking, they scored with “American Idol.” I shamefully admit I watched each week to see who would win. The song selection was horrible, but a few of the participants had chops (Tamyra and Kelly). But every time I watched Justin sing, I felt like I was watching a stage revue on Carnival Cruise Line. What the Hell is Paula Abdul doing here? Thank God for Simon Cowell and his honest opinions. He only spoke what we felt.

All of the above proves one thing: I watch too much TV.